you are now reading the ramblings of a medicated person.

if that makes you uneasy im sorry.

it makes me uneasy too.

&& supposedly paxil is supposed to make my life sunshine & rainbows.

i'm not hungry.

i'm shaking a little.

i bent over & now my stomach hurts.

i thought this drug was supposed to make me strong.

but im more fragile than before.

i can't think about things for too long.

my mind capacity is suddenly diluted & thinned out.

i sat the yellow pill on my desk today

& looked at it for a long while.

i didn't know if numbing my emotions

would actually make me better.

if now this is something i will have to take forever in fear that when i get off it

all the built up emotions will hit me

Full Force.

i just..i don't know.

i feel like im on a cloud

&& everyone is walking on eggshells

but i can still hear them cracking

i'm immune now

but not dead.

i'm still so scared & lonely

a black rose surrounded by white poppies.

scared.so.

scared.

<3<3<3

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